That old guy from the commercials? He licks all of the cookies before packaging them.
Only thing they've produced in the last three months is a two-mile-long mint milano.
The cookies actually smell like a farm.
Whenever you open a bag of cookies you find an empty fifth of tequila.
They openly admit it's not a "farm" but an armed compound full of sugar-crazed fanatics.
When the gingerbread men are anatomically correct.
Two words: hairy cookie.
